Surrender to life = Surrender to death

 

Until the soul has been reunited with the human being, human live an unconscious life often guided by immense fear. We try to control our lifes and try to live it on our own. This is called our free will. This is how we create war. War in the world, war in our relationships and war within ourselves. We are arrogant, ignorant and immature beings, but we do not need to judge ourselves for it. We think we know better than God and we are guided by our pain and existential fear of being on earth. This is a fear every human needs to face and overcome. If we fear to experience life the fullest, then what is the use?

Ultimately, we gradually surrender, for we have experienced living without God simply isn’t fulfilling. We can only surrender after spending enough time being unhappy. Our unhappiness makes us start looking for a purpose and we all have one. We’re all like sperm cells running for our goal, so deeply driven by the life force. Can you imagine sperm cells not trying to reach an egg? Giving up on it’s purpose out of fear of rejection? That’s stupid right? And yet we all do it..
It is the life force within us we need to learn to recognize and learn to surrender to. This is when we start to work with life instead of against it. Still.. sometimes we will mess up but now only because we so desperately want to work for the Divine, still trying to take control. We’re like a wild horse that has finally surrendered and now so eager to do the Work. So we must let go of our eagerness too… The essence of life is letting go, endlessly allowing to flow into the next experience.

We have the right to choose freely in each and every moment, for we each need to make experiences on our own pace. Some people spend their whole lifes stuck in their fears, without even knowing it. That’s okay. But when we finally give up every control and every ego desire, and we face our fear of death, God is there waiting for us. Thank God he is so patient with us. There is absolutely no hurry. There are no expectations and Great Expectations at the same time. Eventually each one of us has to come to peace with death. Some do this at the very end, some only after dying.

And some of us realise that all of life is preparing us for death. Every goodbye, everything we loose, is just practise in letting go.. We must learn to let go of life in order to live it the fullest.. to let go of our attachment to life and everything that beholds it. Attachment to people, to matter, to activities, relationships, certain foods… we must let it all die by fully allowing ourselves to experience it.. we must not hold back the cycle of life and death that wants to work through us.. we must continuously let our old selves die to be reborn again. When we deeply sacrifice our life, we become truly free. Yet everything dies in its own time and after it has served its purpose. For example we can not let go of our addiction to food, when this addiction is fully alive. We can not kill it or make it disappear. We can work out in the gym trying really hard to be skinny, but maybe we might better embrace and love our addiction to food, bring our awareness to it and listen to it, so it can release us and die naturally ..

In our surrender we suddenly experience we are taken care of, as we have always been. We allow life to work through us and it appears that all our desires are met instantly. We are one with life, like a baby child in the womb is one with its mother. We are truly taken care of, all we need to learn is to let go and surrender to the flow of life. Surrender to joy, surrender to pain, surrender to ecstasy, surrender to goodbyes. Surrender to our own death and we become truly free and become who we are: Gods innocent children that play in paradise.

For most of us all of this doesn’t happen in a moment, allthough we do have our moments of enlightened bliss. But most of us keep moving back and forward between ego-oriented life and God-oriented life. We experiment untill we feel safe enough to trust God.

And when I say God, I mean that life force energy we all know so well. It’s there when we make love, when we watch a beautiful sunrise, when we look at a newborn baby.. in our hearts we all know who God is. Yet it’s also just an image people made up so we can understand better what life is about. On earth we work with words and concepts, so we created stories and images of this divine life force which beautifully helps us understand. Sometimes this image can distract us from really experiencing God, which is why in some religions images are forbidden. And you might rather call God the Goddess or Mother or Love, as I do sometimes..

 

Anyway, I wish you a safe journey home and if you ever need guidance I’m here for you, to help you feel into your heart and trust whatever life is giving to you. Everything is merely an experience to guide you home. Remember to pray for help, it even works if you don’t believe in it!

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I thank all the angels that guided me to write this in the middle of the night. Angels that stood around my bed and comforted me in my deepest fear of letting go what I love. I know this is the only way to true unconditional love.

Amen.